Two Common Parenting Blunders

Nobody's perfect. In an age of two working parents, single parent houses, co-parenting, blended families, and just plain, standard mothers and fathers doing the best they can, mistakes occur. Mistake number one: parents too exhausted to parent.

This is perhaps our oldest parenting mistake. Back in "the day," parenting after a very long day hunting and gathering probably looked more like an episode of "Survivor" rather than "The Waltons." Parents put older brothers or sisters in charge of younger siblings; youngsters who could prepare food were put to work, while Mom and Dad shielded the clan from voracious animals and neighbors. In true Darwinian fashion, offspring who did not fit with family norms likely did not survive.

Today, well-meaning, tired parents or guardians know they should not ignore misbehavior, yet occasionally find that it is simply easier to permit the TV and Playstation to parent their kids. Outbursts are met with concessions. Children learn how to act out of independent choices instead of ask permission because they know results from tired parents can be negotiated away through whining, manipulation, persistence, and even good behavior.

This leads us to mistake number two: parents that can't apply appropriate penalties because their kid is exhibiting good behavior such as washing the car, vacuuming, and setting the table. Time off for good behavior only works in prison. In the home, children are in charge of their behavior choices, and parents and guardians are in charge of the subsequent rewards and punishments. If kids are permitted to select their behavior and manipulate the reactions of their parents by acting "good," this can lead to power struggles, perplexity, and more manipulation. Children shortly learn that their tired parents and guardians crave love and contentment (and a clean vehicle), and will do anything to cut down a punishment if their children reward them with good behavior and good attitudes.

Parenting is not for the faint-hearted, and perfection in parenting is a myth! There are many time management books for moms and dads to show how to conserve energy for parenting in the midst of a hectic working schedule. Always keep an eye out for good parental advice and do your best to use a time management plan if you're overworked